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Downsizing the Idea of Self

True to my station in life, my wife and I just downsized from a too-large three story house to a just-right two story that lives on one level, with a light basement for family visitors. No more stairs, pulling garbage cans up a steep driveway, or filling extra rooms with unnecessary belongings. This downsizing has forced us to shed all the stuff we never use or even knew we had - a great exercise in simplifying and a pleasure in passing on useful articles on to others.

Moving a library collected over four decades has also been an exceptionally meaningful exercise. These books on psychology, religion, spirituality and mysticism have been my "friends" for years; parsing them chronicles my long journey from clinical psychologist to interfaith mystic and elder. I am reminded, as I unpack them, of the many faces of God, the many paths we take to reach mystical awareness, and the many religious lenses that give meaning and direction to these paths. But I noticed something else, something far more important: as much as I love these books, I don't need them any more because my understanding of the divine is now direct and immediate, no longer conceptual or second hand. I'm living my understanding now, not seeking it, and I no longer feel a need to secure approval or recognition for my ideas or experiences. I am free to dwell in divine consciousness without pre-requisites, explanations or justifications. In fact, it no longer really matters if my work sells or not - it's already in the omnipresent consciousness of the universe and that is enough.

I believe these kinds of realizations reflect a natural evolution inherent in aging. I no longer need spiritual belief or faith to guide me because I am what I know now. Ambition, the long shadow of ego and identity, has progressively disappeared, surrendered to the primacy of presence, beauty and love. Freed from the straitjacket of thought, a new self now arises spontaneously within, no longer "my" self but a fiery blossom of the divine thrilling me with joy, gratitude and love. My blog is a diary of this evolution in consciousness and I hope it gives you the courage to know what you already know and be what you already are.
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